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Something else

No its not writer's block Its something else Just wondering why am I not writing much these days!

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Confrontation..... just one dance

A warm night it was, as restless as her heart.

She was standing on the terrace, there was a quietness prevailing all around her, everybody in their bedrooms fast asleep, except Mawra. Suddenly she had an urge to have caffeine. Her veins needed a rush of blood instead of this smooth flow or may be she needed a divergence. The books and music were no more helping her tonight.

Back in her room, seeing her reflection in the mirror, she decided to tie her hair in a loose knot, her light blue pajamas were decent enough, she simply draped a stole around her shoulders and went downstairs to the kitchen.

While mixing the coffee she put two mugs on the marble counter. Remembering the weekend night when she was watching a movie and on Daniel's return from Lahore, she was preparing coffee for them both.  But even then they could not have coffee together.

When brought her coffee mug with her in the lawn, there was a sacred silence  which she needed at that moment. At times we need to spend time with ourselves, we need to speak  and listen to our own feelings. Darkness, loneliness and quietness make a decent trio. They launch you inner self out and let you face your own conflicts. You may confront your soul or you may find a way out.

She was sitting on a white lawn swing while having coffee. It was dark, thick and bitter than usual. She needed to alter her taste tonight. May be she needed to alter her thoughts too.

It was many days since she had lost her regular sleep cycle. She had become a night bird, staying up for no reason. And this was effecting her studies adversely. She had lost her appetite, her weight and her natural skin glow. She had lost her charming self too, had grown more quite and secluded.

Was there any reason for all of it? Yes she was sure there was. She was in love. truly, madly, deeply.

There was no resemblance between the two. They were from two different worlds. But did it matter? Nothing matters to Mawra Suhail now, she was at a stage of feelings where nothing matter much. She was sure she was alone in her deep feelings towards him, he would never reciprocate in the same manner, there may be affection , kindness or care, but the reason would never be the same for Daniel Malik. And may be he would never even know her side of story as she had no intention of telling him. Her feelings were so precious to herself, she would never like anybody to make them feel retarded or absurd.

"Mawra, is that You? "

Her thoughts were interrupted by the gentle voice of her father.

"Ji Baba"

"Why up so late? Everything alright?" he came to sit beside her on the swing and put one arm around her shoulders.

His voice was so gentle, for an instant she felt like sharing everything with him.

"No particular reason Baba, just wanted to have coffee. Should I make you some coffee too?"

"In this summer night, no way. You may have altered taste, I don't." he smiled gently.

"Is there something worrying You sweetheart? " he said.

"What gave you that impression?"

"Well, many things, It seems you are going through a transitional phase of your life, as if you are growing up or rather growing mature. It isn't bad to spend time with yourself, but its bad losing your cheery self. I miss my Mawra who was chuckling, giggling  and talking all the time. I miss her laughter in my home. I want may daughter back, bring her back to me , will You please? "

Mawra was speechless, she had nothing to say. It was all true, there was nothing to deny. She just nodded with a half hearted smile. And was surprised to know, his dad was such an observer.

"You can share yourself with anyone you feel at ease with. We are not just your parents, we are your friends too, remember? Don't You ever feel alone my little girl. "

He was giving her another dose of  surprise. How could he reach to something she had only kept to herself.

He brought her back inside and put her to bed like a baby.

She had tears in her eyes when she finally dozed off.

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